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The Butterfly Hunter (Read 315 times)
Cory Raymond
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I Love Poetry!

Posts: 4

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The Butterfly Hunter
Jan 21st, 2010 at 5:01am
 
This is my second post, a poem just composed this morning. (The "Roses" poem came out of the "closet"...)

I think about
children running
in the yard
their butterfly nets
swinging madly

trying (mostly in vain)
to capture the closest
thing to a pixie
that they'll ever see

they'd like to keep
their prizes forever
beauty captured
life extinguished

perhaps to be displayed
in little glass boxes
with pins anchoring them
in death
as they were never
anchored in life

and that reminds me
of myself
my anxious heart
beating faster
as I stand off to the side
just waiting

for a random word
the sharp right turn
of a phrase---
it's all fair game
for a poet and her net

they become
specimens pinned forever
held captive
by the point of a pen
in my little collection
of treasures...
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vicks
Enchanted Poet
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what makes you different,makes
you beautiful.

Posts: 69
Al-Khobar,Saudi Arabia
Gender: male

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Re: The Butterfly Hunter
Reply #1 - Jan 21st, 2010 at 9:43pm
 
Brilliant read,unexpected ending,i like your style.

My favorite stanzas:-

perhaps to be displayed
in little glass boxes
with pins anchoring them
in death
as they were never
anchored in life

for a random word
the sharp right turn
of a phrase---
it's all fair game
for a poet and her net

they become
specimens pinned forever
held captive
by the point of a pen
in my little collection
of treasures...

Keep writing!

~V
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Death isn't so unreal after all.
 
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HaveYouSeenYourDreams2010
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"There's your Karma ripe
as peaches."

Posts: 1311
Lord Major's Walk, York
Gender: male

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Re: The Butterfly Hunter
Reply #2 - Jan 22nd, 2010 at 3:16am
 
Completely with Rashid on this one, brilliant little piece! So sweet and it reminds me if chasing childhood and how I marvelled when I saw a butterfly.
I just love how well this flows and how much care has went into it.

Hoping for more soon!

Syd
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"I don't mind being shot, I just don't dig being told about it." Bob Dylan
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tess730
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Re: The Butterfly Hunter
Reply #3 - Jan 22nd, 2010 at 7:23am
 
Cory,

I really enjoyed reading this.  Very creative, spinning with a little magic.

Will look forward to more of your writing!

Tess
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Cory Raymond
Majestic Poet
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My Tabby

Posts: 1569
McAllen Texas
Gender: female

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Re: The Butterfly Hunter
Reply #4 - Feb 1st, 2010 at 10:08am
 
Many thanks to the three of you who commented on this poem. Your support really means a lot to me. Sorry I didn't reply sooner, but, as mentioned in my "Roses Again" post, I got locked out of the site due to technical difficulties for close to a week!

Best wishes,

cory
Smiley Smiley Smiley
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I've written some poetry I don't understand myself ~ Carl Sandburg
 
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Carys
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Posts: 1138
Wales
Gender: female

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Re: The Butterfly Hunter
Reply #5 - Feb 3rd, 2010 at 8:15pm
 
Hi Cory

This really is a lovely piece of writing, you have captured your butterflies beautifully!

The only lines that jarred a little with me were

and that reminds me
of myself

they just feel a little solid, matter of fact for such a winsome piece.

Great use of imagery throughout this poem.

Carys
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« Last Edit: Feb 3rd, 2010 at 8:17pm by Carys »  
Carys  
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